I remember when I first guessed the truth about Santa Claus, and how devastating that was. Being a kid in Seattle today is probably even worse, since Mayor Greg Nickels has started Operation Save Santa, a campaign to tell kids about global warming–the message of which appears to be pretty much, “Hey kids! If we don’t stop global warming, Santa will be homeless!” Which, in my mind at least, conjures up images of a dirty Santa in his suit, huddled over a trash can fire somewhere in upper Alaska-ish. Maybe with a bindle, and only 7 tiny reindeer, picking his teeth with one tiny leg bone.
The mayor sent out an open letter to Santa, concerned about the melting polar ice caps, and at a conference for new mayors this week said, “We know reindeer can fly, but we are not sure they can tread water [Bloomberg]”. And then he pointed out how good Seattle is doing with following the Kyoto protocol stuff, which is great and all, but seriously? Santa? I guess that part of the Operation was to hand out energy-efficient lightbulbs before the Westlake tree lighting ceremony, and to ask Santa to put Seattle on his “nice” list for being so good, but I’m still pretty sure that homeless Santa and drowning reindeer crosses some sort of line.
The Washington Policy Center responded a couple of days ago with a letter suggesting that if Santa does have to move, he could move to the South Pole, where ice is increasing. Maybe he could bring along all those drowning polar bears, too.