Size is a minor point of pride for SIFF. Once again, with 268 features (204 narrative and 54 documentary) and 124 shorts, the twenty-five day film marathon retains the title of the country’s biggest and, if all goes according to plan, the most attended. On Thursday morning, regional press types were invited to the Alki Room in Seattle Center to get sugared and mimosaed up in the future home of the SIFF Film Center before marching over to the SIFF Cinema to preview what the festival’s planners have in store for our first few weeks of summer. For film lovers, the timing is extremely fortuitous arriving at the end of a relative drought of post-Oscarbait withdrawal and just a little bit before the Seattle weather is so spectacular that hiding away in theaters feels criminal. From the looks of the lineup, there will be plenty of excuses to spend evenings indoors.

The festivities kick off at the Paramount on 21 May with a gala presentation of In the Loop, a political farce hinging around various governments misunderstandings and misrepresentations of the word “unforeseeable” in the lead-up to a certain middle east invasion. Introducing the film, made by the producers of the BBC’s “The Thick of It”, Artistic Director Carl Spence encouraged us to laugh internally, but I confess that on more than a few occasions my laughter became external. In the realm of opening night screenings (which have ranged from abysmal the Notebook to Me and You and Everyone We Know), this one falls on the “worthwhile” end of the scale. I’d wager the that it’s also the most profane. For many attendees, I expect that it will be the first, second, and third time that they’ve heard “lubricated horse cock” thrown casually into an invective tirade. There’s something kind of great about treating guests to nearly two hours of inventive British expletives before sending them out into the streets for a paella party on Ninth Avenue. Unlike last year’s tragic misunderstanding, everyone will get at least a couple of drink tickets and very important people will be able to drink until their livers bleed.

At the festival’s midpoint, Lynn Shelton’s Cannes-bound Humpday, about two straight guys contemplating going gay for possible pay (for the Stranger’s porn competition, which has cash prizes, right?), snags the Centerpiece Gala spot. It’s only one of the [record-setting] sixteen Northwest features being presented at the festival. Along the way big name guests like Spike Lee (this year’s Golden Space Needle winner) and Francis Ford Coppolla are expected to drop by to present new films and No Age will perform a live score for the Bear at the Triple Door (the Face the Music tradition manages to get more awesome every year). Finally, more than three weeks after it starts, film marathoners will cross the metaphorical finish line with a sequel to the 2006 audience’s favorite film: OSS 117: Lost in Rio, which plays at the Cinerama [thx Vulcan!] and is followed by a celebration of exhaustion nearby.

Throughout, SIFF ticket stubs will get attendees discount on food and drink specials at Boom[!] Noodle, which will serve as a post-film party lounge during the festival for spotting staffers, guests, and chatting with fellow fans. Those flung further from the city center and traditional theater configuration will be happy to know that the festival will be showing second- or third-runs of some films across the lake in Kirkland at the Performing Arts Center and in West Seattle at the Admiral. Last year’s online screenings have been cut, but some festival extras will be online at SIFFtv.

After watching a string of previews, my head was already swimming with choices — Moon, 500 Days of Summer, All Tomorrow’s Parties, We Live In Public among the more glittery — and there are still many more to consider. Somewhat amazingly, the SIFF staff running the press conference were persuaded to each name their one favorite festival entries. A cheat sheet to seed your agenda with dance card and a little insight into the personalities behind the festival:

• Carl Spence, Artistic Director: Don’t Let Me Drown
• Deborah Person, Managing Director: Gotta Dance
• Maryna Ajaja, Programmer: Tulpan
• Beth Barrett, Programming Manager: Morris: A Life with Bells On
• Dustin Kaspar Education: Tall Hot Blonde

Of course, you’ll be swimming in opinions and options in just a few days. Members get a chance to watch the preview reel next week and the official schedule appears on 7 May. Start strategizing (or just buy a pass or ticket pack and play it by ear): gala tickets are on sale now and the box office opens to the public on 8 May.