Yow! After the jump, here’s the recap for last week’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy [abc], courtesy of special guest recapper Ellen. Behind the jump, all of the fallout from last week’s proposals, an important lesson about mixing new age and conventional treatments, a Notebook moment for Mother Grey, miraculous leaps through red tape and construction projects, and an eight million dollar sex ed lesson.

Meredith Voice Over: “As surgeons, we live in a world of worst case scenarios. We cut ourselves from hoping for the best, because too many times the best doesn’t happen. But every now and then, the extraordinary occurs.”

(Ferries, neighborhoods, downtown, and that round building {I have never liked} on Pike)

Cristina pondering the rather large diamond Burke has given her, sitting on the bed.

George looks at Callie in the elevator, they both look nervous, and they hold hands. They step off the elevator of meaningful looks and into the hospital together.

“And suddenly, best case scenarios seem possible.”

Izzy and Bailey stand in front of the Denny Duquette Memorial Clinic (DDMC), which seems to be located right across from the emergency room. Izzy: “Eight days, eight million dollars.” {They really opened a clinic in 8 days? That is amazing and also unbelievable}

VO: “And every now and then, something amazing happens.” And something amazing has happened: Mama Grey has woken up and is aware. She’s lucid and remembers everything except the last five years, and of course she doesn’t know that she has Alzheimer’s. They’ve selected lucky Mer to tell her. Also, she’s been anxious to see Mer. VO: “And against our better judgment, we start to have hope.”

Burke and Derek both pounce on the Chief, all wanting something this morning on the surgery floor. Early for them to be in the race? he wonders. Well, they’re all in the race. Addison and Sloane look on, and he asks her why she isn’t fighting she says she’ll fight like a girl, letting them kill each other and being the only one left. He thinks that maybe she’s underestimating him. What about him? She doesn’t think about him at all. But he’s got a couple tricks up his sleeve. He jumps into the Chief Wannabe fray by announcing that Bailey’s clinic opened that morning and he thought he’d go show some support. The Chief thinks that’s a great idea, and goes with him. The other three wannabes are left to marvel at his scheming ability.

Back to the room of the recently lucid. Mama Grey feels bad about the fight she and Mer had, right before Mer left for Europe {apparently the last time she remembers seeing her}. MG feels bad about the fight. She thinks maybe she had a nervous breakdown she can’t remember anything. If Mer doesn’t want to go to med school . . . . more than anything, MG wants to go home. But MG is home. Mer explains about the Alzheimer’s, and MG freaks out {wouldn’t anyone?} and clenches her hands in extreme tension. Then she has some kind of attack.

(Flyover of a marina — this seems to be an increasingly popular Seattle scene)

Burke goes out to meet the ambulance that holds MG Mer tells him she’s having some kind of chest pain. MG can handle it though — she’s diagnosing herself. Mer also tells Burke that she’s lucid. MG realizes that she’s at Seattle Grace. Mer tells her this is where she’s doing her residency. Burke compliments Mer, and she asks about Richard Webber. Burke tells her that he’s the Chief now, and she is impressed.

At the DDMC all the interns are working there for the day {what an odd staffing technique!}. In the empty, fancy clinic. They’re going to be giving flu vaccines, and shouldn’t touch anything, because it’s all brand new and expensive. Cristina wants to get out and assist with a fancy surgery Burke has, but Alex informs her that Burke already asked him to scrub in. Izzy’s a little over excited, and stares at the door like she’s going to burn a hole in it. Someone comes through the door, but it’s just the Chief and Sloane coming to “show support.” Noticing the emptiness, they wonder if the clinic is actually open. Bailey assures them that it is. The Chief asks about Izzy’s staring, and Bailey says that she’s just waiting. Someone else comes through the door! But alas it’s just George and Callie, grinning like idiots. After a beat they announce that they got married in Vegas! Everyone looks shocked, and Alex astutely observes that Callie is now “Callie O’Malley” {from this high point the rest of the hour can only be a disappointment}.

Izzy lectures George about how fast this is while Callie sneaks up. Izzy might be concerned, but they’re incredibly happy. Izzy checks out the ring it’s small and kindly observes that tiny diamonds are good because “no one will ever try to steal it.” {What an awesome thing to say.} Bailey has had enough of everyone standing around, and perhaps to diffuse the awkward ring talk, she assigns the interns elsewhere — Burke needs Cristina, George needs to go to the Pit and see the Chief, and Izzy and Alex are tasked with finding some patients for the clinic {even if they have to steal them?}

George says to the Chief that they’re both married. Except that Chief is getting a divorce. Awkward! That’s life, though. They go in to see this week’s sole Stranger-Patient a woman from whom the Chief removed a large tumor a few months ago. Now she’s undergoing chemo and radiation. Some guy comes in it’s S-P’s boyfriend, but he has no idea that she’s getting treated for cancer {how would you not notice this?}. The Chief sees MG go by in a wheelchair, and tells George to get started.

The Chief sees the Greys and starts talking to Mer but MG remembers him, and he sees she’s lucid. He tells her that yes, he is the Chief, but that he’s stepping down. MG observes that his stepping down must have been Adele’s idea. Mer and the Chief talk. He looks stunned by MG’s lucidity, and gives her a day off. He tells her that this time is a “gift” although Mer clearly doesn’t feel that way. MG is waiting for her in the elevator of significance.

Elsewhere, Burke is going over MG’s chart (he’s her doctor) and tells Cristina that she’s lucid. Although it won’t last. Cristina asks about Mer. Burke says that MG needs the best care now, and she’s the best. But she’s not wearing the ring, and it’s been over a week. Does she not like the ring? She observes that it’s a 3 carat diamond cut platinum it’s THE ring. Then she asks if he’s using the surgery to pressure her? He doesn’t answer, but probably.

Some random guy in the ER lobby gets pounced upon by Izzy and Alex. They’re trying to poach this patient, whose problem is that it hurts when he pees. He probably needs some meds, but they’re surgeons. Does he need surgery? Alex advises that he never knows. And besides, Izzy says, it’s free! But his co-pay is only $10. They point out that a cougher in the lobby also waiting to see a doctor might have TB. Klassy, but this convinces him to go to the DDMC.

Cristina is checking MG. MG can tell she’s good friends with Mer, because Cristina refuses to look at her — afraid she might ask a personal question about Mer, and Cristina might answer. MG then asks if Mer has chosen a specialty, although they agree that this is the most personal question a surgeon can be asked. Cristina says that her mother would ask if she had a boyfriend, and MG says that Cristina’s mother is a frivolous woman {nice}. Cristina asks what it would say about her if she wanted to be a heart surgeon. MG says it would mean she’s incredibly driven. {This is an interesting way of reading tea leaves}. MG understands she is in an experimental Alzheimer’s trial, and wants to see the doctor who put her in it (aka her daughter’s boyfriend).

Cristina finds Mer outside, looking at the clinic and avoiding her mother. Cristina says MG wants to meet Derek– but as a doctor, not as Mer’s boyfriend. She didn’t tell, but she also says that MG will know — she has ways. Also, Cristina kind of loves her. Mer observes that this is a sentiment held among many people who are not her daughter. Izzy comes by, wheeling her stolen patient who hurts when he pees. Izzy asks about MG, and advises that all parental disappointment ends upon obtaining a medical degree {want to bet?}. Izzy says she needs to justify the clinic. She also wonders if Callie is pregnant. Izzy runs off (so as not to lose the peeing patient, who has been sitting in the wheelchair this entire time), and Cristina breaks the news of George and Callie’s nuptials.

Mer goes to find George to say congratulations. She observes that this was an impulsive move, and asks if it was “good” impulsive, or “Meredith” impulsive, and says that if it’s the latter, maybe she can help. George says that it’s good, and she says congrats, and he seems genuinely pleased.

Mer is then ambushed by MG, who has been waiting for her.

Elsewhere in the hospital of inappropriate relationships, Alex walks by with a patient and gets caught in the lascivious gaze of Addision, who seems to be almost licking her lips at the sight of him. Callie catches the whole thing, and comes over to compare Addison to that cartoon bear who is hungry and sees the bare table turn into a turkey with all the trimmings and “waves of deliciousness” coming off of it. Ad says no — Alex is “the help” and she’s not going to sleep with the help. Callie announces that she married the help, and then compares herself to the cartoon bear, spotting the cute intern with his waves of deliciousness. She comments that by getting married in Las Vegas she “embraced the trashy.” Addison admires the ring, which Callie says is small, but Ad pronounces beautiful. And they hug.

Back to the hospital room of reunion. MG is standing at her tray-table, almost as though she’s a teacher at the podium, and Mer is seated in a chair with her legs up, almost in the fetal position. MG asks (interrogates) Mer about her life. She really wants to know. Mer starts by saying that she has a boyfriend, and MG wonders if he understands the demands of being a surgeon. Mer says yes, he does, because he’s a doctor too. She starts to go on, but MG interrupts to ask if she’s chosen a specialty. Mer stammers, and says she’s waiting to be inspired. This is not acceptable — for example, Cristina has already chosen. But Mer is happy, she has a BF and really is in love/is loved, and that is what is important. She is “really happy” but this is completely unacceptable to MG, who starts going on a tirade about how she didn’t raise Mer to be “happy” and “ordinary.” She used to be a “passionate” “force of nature.” She also thinks the fact that Mer’s mother (i.e., her) has Alzheimer’s would be inspiring enough. Besides, anyone can fall in love and be happy, and ordinary. She did not raise Mer to be ordinary. She is furious, and Mer looks really sad.

George is doing something with S-P, and the boyfriend is standing there. He can’t believe he didn’t know about the cancer, but they just met in the laundry room of their building. But does he really know anything about S-P? He doesn’t even know her middle name. It turns out to be “Rose,” which George has learned from S-P’s driver’s license. Also, George, having done something involving being exposed to S-P’s blood, starts shaking and sweating.

Derek is going in for his promised consult with MG. Mer warns him not to get too personal, but he says he can handle it.

George runs into Olivia, who asks if he is okay after his impulsive, secret Vegas elopement. He says he’s not feeling well, and she wonders if it is the marriage. He gives her S-P’s blood to be taken to the lab, and his dirty scrubs. He then runs into Callie, and starts freaking out about how he doesn’t know her middle name, and is shaky and feeling terrible. Callie is frustrated — in Vegas with TV and room service everything was great, but now that they’re back at work and around his “judgey” friends, he’s freaking out {ed: Or is it that they’re back to reality period? Maybe?}

Derek discusses MG’s case with her. She suggests a functional MRI, but he says that no test can help. She marvels that in five years there have been no advances, and wonders how he can work with Alzheimer’s patients day in and out. He tells her that he’s not actually an Alzheimer’s specialist — rather he took a personal interest because of Mer. This sets her off — he’s not there for HER, he’s there because of Mer. Of course — he is the man distracting Mer from being a fighter and a force of nature. And how inappropriate — an attending! Dating an intern! No wonder Mer can’t concentrate. And Derek is just a man who can’t be with a woman of his own stature, and just wants someone to admire him. He stammers that that’s not how it is, but MG concludes that he is damaging Mer and he doesn’t care at all.

George goes to the clinic, feeling flu-ish and needing to lay down. Alex goes to replace him in the OR for S-P’s surgery. He enters just as the Chief is starting. He wonders where George is, and Alex says he isn’t feeling well — he’s married, after all. They start cutting.

Back in the DDMC, there are lots of sick hospital staff but still no patients {what happened to pee guy?}. Izzy is worried — it’s not so much the $8M, although she does keep citing this figure, but the legacy of Denny that’s important. But then! A man comes in with his daughter and a paper bag, which holds tampons! Yes, his daughter is a woman and they need some help with womanly things. What a perfect job for Izzy the surgeon {is she still on candy-striper duty?}.

Also in the DDMC, now both Olivia and the woman from the lab are also feeling flu-like. Bailey says George should go home because he’s contagious. But he quickly acts as diagnostician, and realizes that S-P’s blood is toxic. He calls up to OR 1, but they’re all already passed out on the floor from toxic patient.

S-P’s blood is toxic! Everyone who had been in the OR is on stretchers. Mer comes by to try to help, but Derek (recently chastened by his talking to from MG, most likely) tells her that she should be with her mother. We learn that S-P’s blood is toxic because of an interaction between her chemotherapy and some herbal supplement she’s been taking (they found it by going through her purse). Callie finds George, and he tells her the “good news” that it’s not their marriage that was making him sick. She’s nonplussed by this information.

Cristina comes into see MG — there is something wrong with her heart and they want to do surgery. She asks why they don’t just give her meds, but realizes that it’s because Alzheimer’s patients are notoriously bad about taking their meds. Cristina informs her further that MG is known to be particularly difficult. MG says that she could elect not to have the surgery — even though this heart problem would eventually kill MG. MG asks Cristinia what she would do if the thing that defines her (her mind?) were taken away. MG says she doesn’t want the surgery. It will eventually kill her without treatment. What would Cristina do when the thing that defines who she is was taken away? MG says no surgery. But Mer gets to make all her medical decisions (even in this brief stage of lucidity).

Back at the DDMC Izzy is instructing Daughter in how to be a woman. Everyone involved looks bored. Bailey comes in and allows Izzy to leave, and then asks the Dad to wait outside. Daughter immediately bursts into a tirade, asking whether she can be pregnant if she had sex before her period. Oh dear! And now the guy she slept with is “totally ignoring her.” {ed: Last year my 28 year old friend’s father informed her that “sometimes men will say ‘I love you’ to get you to sleep with them.” She wished he’d dropped this pearl of wisdom about 15 years earlier}. Bailey looks shocked.

Mer isn’t sure what MG should do. But she has to make the decisions. She starts yelling at her — about how she gets phone calls from the home asking if she was planning on giving the nurse who changes her mother’s diapers every morning a Christmas tip. But she does it because she is the only one — because her mother has alienated everyone else, and Mer is the only one left. And if she is unfocused and ordinary, it’s not because of her boyfriend — it’s because of her mother. But she’s not going to allow her mother to die, because that would be one more thing that has happened to her, and she’s not going to let it.

Back in the toxic OR, Burke and Derek are putting on airtight suits to operate on S-P. They’ll have only 30 minutes, but as they’re not quite ready Addison notices S-P coming out from under the anesthesia. Crisis! She runs in to put her back under (she’s open on the table, how horrifying!) without a suit, and stumbles out, into the arms of Mark Sloane. How valiant! {ed: All a part of the race to be Chief?} The other wannabes, Burke and Derek, then rush in to try and close up S-P and end the toxicity.

In MG’s room, she’s having some kind of attack and her heart is beating very fast. Cristina rushes in and asks the nurse to page Burke, but he’s already in with the Toxic One. MG tells Cristina to do some kind of massage to stop the attack, which works. MG says that Cristina is a good doctor, good under pressure, and will make a great surgeon. Cristina asks her if she can have it all — be a great surgeon and have a life? She tells her that a man has asked her to marry him, but she knows it didn’t work out for MG. MG says that she didn’t try hard enough to have it all, and Cristina thanks her.

The Chief is taking oxygen in the gallery and watching the brain surgeon and the heart surgeon trying to finish a bowel surgery. Mer comes in to see how he is. He says he’ll be better once his patient is off the table, and observes that you think you’re irreplaceable, but then people come in, do your surgeries — better than you could. Look at Mer — her mother has been out of the game for five years, and she’s become something. But MG thinks Mer is a disappointment. The Chief says that in a perfect world MG would be able to say that she’s proud of Mer, but it’s not a perfect world, and she’s not a perfect woman. Mer says that the person her mother most wants to see is the Chief. He knows this, but the only thing she wants to hear is that he regrets staying with Adele, and he doesn’t.

Downstairs, Burke and Derek can’t get the bowel back in — and they only have 8 minutes of air left!

Back at the DDMC, Daughter’s pregnancy and STD tests are negative. Daughter is angry that Bailey told Dad about the sexual activity, and her father tells her to be polite. Bailey observes that politeness isn’t helping these two at all, and does some counseling. If Daughter keeps going the way she is, she will get an STD, she will get pregnant, and she will increase her chances of getting cervical cancer (way to work in the link between HPV and cervical cancer!). Bailey says Daughter is too young to be having sex, whereupon she breaks down — she thought the boy liked her. Bailey hugs Daughter, then passes her off to Dad.

Callie finds George, still pissed that he thought their marriage was toxic. He thought she’d be proud of his heroics, and asks her to excuse him for thinking he was having an anxiety attack. She says that they were happy in Vegas, but back at SGH, around his judgmental friends, he freaks out {ed: Is it really the judge-y friends, or the fact that they’re back to reality? Just a thought}. She’s angry that he never stands up for her, and storms off.

At the DDMC, Addison is taking oxygen after her heroics, while someone listens to Alex breathe, while lifting up his shirt. Addision seems to be in a toxic blood/Alex Karev admiring stupor.

Izzy, Mer, and Cristina continue to observe the toxic surgery from the gallery. The bowel isn’t fitting — it needs to be decompressed and repacked. But the chief wannabes are running out of air! The Chief tells Burke to milk the bowel, while Izzy observes that you don’t marry the “rebound girl,” thinking of George (Callie was the rebound from Meredith?). Izzy also calls Callie George’s “Vegas Show Wife” {though she doesn’t wear sequins nearly often enough to deserve that title}. Burke and Derek are fading fast but try to keep going (the chief race, and all). They both collapse from lack of oxygen, and Cristina observes that {their both lying on the floor unconscious from lack of oxygen in a toxic-gas OR} is “not good.”

The Chief assigns Sloane and the lady interns to pack and wrap Toxic Patient. Sloane announces he is not going in, as he is the only attending who hasn’t now been exposed to the neurotoxin, and exposing himself would be irresponsible {perhaps this is his elaborate plot to be chief?}. Cristina volunteers to go first as she can hold her breath for a long time underwater. She rushes in, but isn’t able to finish the job. Next up is Izzy, trying to put plastic around the open wound to encapsulate the toxicity, but she can’t finish. Last up is Meredith, who does manage to seal the body up.

Done poisoning the entire hospital staff, Toxic Patient is resting comfortably behind glass and on dialysis, slated to be un-toxic in a few hours. Her BF and George observe her. She wakes up, and says (through the intercom) that she’s sorry about all this — she thought when she met him all the bad stuff was behind her. BF tells her that it is, and George seems to learn a lesson.

The Chief congratulates everyone on their heroic work, then he and Sloane go to check on the patient. They observe that he’s getting all the glory without much risk. Because he’s Mark Sloane, and that’s how it works.

And DDMC, Izzy finds Bailey to apologize for leaving. She crows about her “damage control” on Toxic Patient. Bailey says everything is fine, because she got to help $8 million worth of one patient.

MG is in her room, singing softly (sadly) to herself. The Chief comes in to see her, finally. She asks him if (in her Alzheimer state) she knows who Meredith is. He says she knows Mer is someone important to her. MG wishes she could go back and do things differently — primarily fight harder for him {not be a better mother?}. He says they would have had a great life together — done their fellowship at SGH, she would have fought him for Chief (and probably won). And he would have been at home for her, with their kids, and they would have all been happy. The way Meredith is happy. MG acknowledges that life could have been ordinary, and happy, and good. MG says that her life is unfinished, but the Chief tells her to just close her eyes and think of them, together and happy, with a family, and him to come home to every night.

In the locker room, scrubbed of toxicity, George and Callie enter. Izzy asks rather rudely “you’re not moving in, are you?” This prompts George to freak out as Callie starts to leave. He stands up to his “judge-y” friends. He tells them that if they want to drive Callie away — which they’re good at — then fine, but he’ll be driving away too. He then uses her whole name (according to the Internets it is Calliope Euphegenia Torres) and, as Izzy starts to say something about that, he tells her to shut it. Callie beams.

(Flyover the Space Needle)

Meredith VO: “As doctors, we’re trained to give our patients just the fact= s.” (Addison and Sloane kissing and sweaty) VO: “But what our patients really want to know is: Will the pain ever go away, will I feel better, am I cured?” Sloane says he thought Addison didn’t think of him, and she tells him, at that very moment, that she is actively not thinking of him {I think we all know who she IS thinking of}. VO: “What our patients really want to know is: Is there hope?” At the Burkeatorium, Cristina plunks the ring down on the counter and says she doesn’t do rings. She tells him not to expect her to change — she’s a surgeon, just like him. And that they’ll have money, and they can “hire a wife.” He asks if she’s saying yes. She says “yeah,” he tells her she still can’t scrub in on the surgery, and she tells him she’s still not wearing the ring. Then the hug and celebrate.

VO: “But, inevitably, there are times when you find yourself in the worst case scenario.” Mer walks into her mother’s hospital room to say something Important, though the Chief tries to stop her. She says that she doesn’t want her to die, she wants her to have the surgery, because she hopes that someday there will be a cure for Alzheimer’s, and that then they will have a second chance, and her mother will be able to know her, really. Because then she will see that she is totally not ordinary. But, she leaves it up to her mother about the surgery — it’s her life, after all. MG has been looking a little disheveled throughout this speech, and then says to Meredith that she “reminds [her] of [her] daughter.” Uh oh, Alzheimer’s has returned. The lucidity gift has expired. The Chief says that about an hour ago she was there, and then gone the next minute. He is sorry, and so is Meredith.

VO: “When the patient’s body has betrayed them, when all the science has failed them, when the worst case scenario comes true, clinging to hope is all we’ve got left.”

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